Right away I want to say that this a conversation for adults. If you're a kid, please stop this video. If there is an adult that you feel safe discussing queer topics with, have them watch the video first and determine if it's appropriate for you. For parents with young kids around, I will be acknowledging sex in this discussion. The first thing you should know about the law is that it's very short. Typically speaking, this isn't a good thing because when a law doesn't go into much detail, it leaves a lot of room for interpretation. It makes it a very broad law that can have effects the writers didn't intend. I believe the writers of this law intended this as an attack on the queer community, but whether they left it vague intentionally in an effort to multiply its impact, or if they just did a rush job, I don't know. It's brief and lazily written, vague in its guidelines and thus opaque in its consequences, effectively making it an open door to discrimination. Proponents of the law argue that it doesn't specifically target LGBTQ kids, but the unclear nature of the law definitely makes room for it to do so. It does, undoubtedly, target the queer community. So what exactly is in the law? Officially known as HB 1557, the Florida bill is called the "Parental Rights in Education Act." It says that there can be no discussion of gender identity or sexual orientation from kindergarten through 3rd grade, and that above that grade, discussions must be "age appropriate." However, it does not define what "age appropriate" means. So if I school decides that one of their teachers acknowledging the existence of their same-sex spouse in front of an 18yo student is not "age appropriate," then this law grants them the ability to fire that teacher. While proponents argue that it doesn't target the word "gay," that's an absurd red herring because it does specifically target "sexual orientation and gender identity." You can always spot a bad faith argument when it gets that distracted by semantics like this. Proponents also argue that the bill only prohibits the "instruction" of topics pertaining to sexual orientation and gender identity, when in reality it prohibits any and all "discussion," effectively making it illegal for a student to talk about their same-sex parents. Again, I don't know if the writers were intentionally vague or just inept, but the result is the same. Additionally, proponents say that the bill prevents teachers from "sexualizing children." To which, I have two responses: Being gay or bi or trans isn't just about sexual attraction, it's about romantic interest, it's about love, it's about the crushes we all have as kids. If you're fine encouraging little straight boys to have crushes on girls but think acknowledging a little gay boy having a crush on another boy is "sexualizing children," then you're being a hypocrite. Second, the law does not prevent discussion of sex in school, even among kindergartners to 3rd graders. No, it only prevents the discussion of "sexual orientation and gender identity." If their aim had been to prevent the "sexualization of children," they would make any discussion of sex illegal. The fact that it is only non-straight, non-cisgender topics that they have outlawed is very telling. More insidiously, the law prevents any rule barring teachers from divulging suspicions about a student's sexual orientation or gender identity to their parents. In fact, it gives parents the right to sue if they find out a teacher or school withheld this information from them. Why is this a big deal? Proponents argue that parents should have the right to know what's going on in their child's life. But here's the thing: Not all parents are the same. Not all homes are created equal. There are provisions that allow a teacher to withhold this information if they have a reasonable belief that the child may be harmed; however, as many teachers have mentioned, it's hard to know exactly what a child's home life is like. And there are many different types of harm, not all of which can be measured with an x-ray. When I was a young gay kid, I lived in a very religious home that was not at all accepting of homosexuality. One of my earliest memories is of my mother telling me about how when she was a teen, her best friend her whole life told her that she "liked girls," and my mother saying that was the last time she ever spoke to her. I wasn't yet in kindergarten, but it burned like a hot brand into my brain because in the back of my mind, I knew she was talking about me and what would happen if I ever let my secret slip to her. As a teen, I was able to confide in some of my friends at school. I found a safe space within the walls of our theatre department, surrounded by open-minded people who weren't disgusted by me or my secret. And in that class I found a teacher who knew and accepted me as I was. For the first time, I had a place I could just be me. Now imagine if that teacher was legally obligated to call and out me to my parents. My parents who had made it clear form a young age that they would disown me. In fact, that happened to another boy I went to school with. He came out to his parents and quickly wound up in the foster care system. Imagine as a kid knowing that you couldn't be yourself at home, at church, even at school. Imagine carrying around a heavy secret 24/7 for your entire life. It becomes easier to understand why 42% of LGBTQ youth considered suicide in the last year. Almost one out of two queer kids has recently thought about ending their own life. Every 45 seconds, a queer kid in the US attempts to kill themselves. This number drops significantly when they live in an accepting home, but not every kid is going to have that. And not every kid is going to find a friend, or a class, or a teacher who they can share their secret with. But if they do, why are we trying to yank that way from them? Suppressing and running from the existence of sexual and gender minorities doesn't make them go away, it doesn't "protect parents," it only harms kids. Don't Say Gator is a direct rebuttal to these bigoted laws. It acknowledges the hatred these kids face but without dignifying those absurd arguments with a response. Instead, it aims to rise above the debate, going high when they go low, eschewing counterpoints in favor of just celebrating the joy and beauty of being yourself regardless of what others say. We don't have the means to overturn this draconian law, but we can try, with out limited resources, to shine some sun through the rain clouds and let those kids know that there is light at the end of what must seem like a very long and endless tunnel. Thank you for supporting Don't Say Gator and I hope you all have a safe and happy 4th of July! If you think about it, tell your family and friends about us.
Follow us on Instagram, Twitter, and TikTok @dontsaygator
"Don't Say Gator" stickers now available for use on Instagram and anywhere else you use GIPHY stickers!
